Dear Annie: I am currently starting a war with my mother -in -law because of her interference in our life

Dear Annie: My husband, “Jake”, and I've been married for eight years. We have a 5-year-old son, “Caleb”. For the most part we have a solid marriage, but there is a problem that keeps appearing – his mother, “Linda”.

Linda has always been a little arrogant, but since Caleb was born, it has gotten worse. She holds unannounced at least twice a week, criticizes my parenting (“You should really make his lunch from scratch”) and welcomes her. Last month she gave Caleb ice cream shortly before going to bed, although I told her that it shouldn't do so. When I said something, she laughed and told me I should “brighten”.

I said Jake how much it bothers me, but he avoids conflicts. He says: “That's how she is” and tells me I should let go. But I can't let it go; It's exhausting. I don't want to found a family war, but I don't want to feel respected again and again in my own home.

How do I deal with it when my husband doesn't rise? – tired from the third parent

Better tired: just because her husband is used to his mother's behavior does not mean that they have to accept it. The first step is a conversation with Jake. Explain to him that the presence of his mother influences her feeling of privacy and control in your own home and that you have to support him in this way for reasons of your marriage. Then together you can set some basic rules for his mother's visits.

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