Sel tips for parents of a child psychologist

When you go to school to teach, you will learn how to teach content. They examine methods, strategies and approaches for reading, mathematics, history and natural sciences – for primary school it is the basics. There are more complex topics for older classes. The content is usually age -appropriate and a wider, goal -oriented curriculum. But regardless of the class what they not Teaching you is social emotional learning (SEL). Usually SEL is left behind from the curriculum and left to the parents (and sometimes the consultants or school social workers).

I was a teacher for 11 years before I worked freelance and I learned one or two things about the importance of a solid basis for social emotional learning (SEL). I saw how students climb with a strong feeling and the students fight without them. And now I respect the concept of social emotional learning more than ever in my most important role as a mother. In fact, I somehow think Sel is everything.

Social emotional learning is often referred to as SEL. It is the Umbrella term for the concept of learning and exploring how you are aware, responsible, regulated your emotions and make good decisions. These must-have capabilities are essential for growth and thrive. Children fight without them.

Teaching SEL at home can feel intimidating. You may not know where to start or how to make the “right way”. To help, Dr. Adrian Oxman, a children's psychologist and a mother of two years based in New Jersey, and a mother of two years, her expertise and an insight about what exactly shares SEL, why it is important and how parents can help to promote it.

What is social emotional learning (SEL)?

Oxman says SEL is the process in which children learn to understand and manage their feelings and emotions how they build healthy relationships and how to recognize life skills that are necessary to grow and mature in a healthy way. Essentially, she says: “We try to acquire skills in areas such as self -confidence, emotion regulation, social awareness, relationships and responsible decision -making.”

Why is SEL important for children?

As a mother of two children, Oxman says that she feels very passionate about the topic. “Not being dramatic,” she says, “but it doesn't matter whether your child can read, write and count on 100 if it cannot manage her emotions. Emotional intelligence is just as important, if not more than academic skills. “

Understanding, expressing and managing emotions are part of the necessary basics for personal well -being. And Oxman notes that children who can manage their emotions effectively and carefully are often better equipped in order to face life challenges and to develop resilience.

“It's like building a house,” she says, “Academic skills are important bricks, but emotional intelligence is the basis that supports everything else.” Yes, it is so important – especially if there is difficult weather (an inevitable part of growing up).

Sel tips for parents

So how can you help to support and develop SEL at home? Oxman says that the main path and the most organic path through Model. “Learn children to watch their parents. So if you can identify and manage your emotions in a healthy way, your children will also start, ”she says.

As with most worthwhile efforts in parenthood, this is a little easier to say than done. But it makes so much sense when you think about it. “You would never bring a child to a seesaw, tell you that you should find an even place and then go away,” says Oxman. “You need you to help you find this balance. This is a co-regulation. “

Another Sel tip for parents is too Create a non -valuable environment in which open communication is promoted. Oxman says that this looks like asking questions that may contain: “How did you feel?” Or “How do you think your friend felt when it happened?” They help them to build self/different awareness and empathy through perspective.

You can do it too Use books, shows or films– may even be some favorites of your little one – to research these topics and serve as helpful but organic reference points. Oxman says that this can be a good way to help children understand different aspects of SEL, because they can discuss the emotions of the characters, the decisions, the actions they have taken, the words and more.

And of course you also want to be sure that you want to deal with small pieces have clear and consistent limits At home on the spot. These will help your child learn self -management while clearly defined expectations and consequences navigate. Oxman emphasizes: “Consistent routines and limits help children to understand limits and develop self -regulation.”

About the author

Erin Celletti, contributing writer

Erin is a writer based in NYC with a BA in journalism from Quinnipiac University and two master's degrees in education. She is a proud mom for a little girl and a life writer of lifestyle, beauty, wellness and trends. Beyond the EveryMoma, Erins was editorial work in publications as presented Hustle and bustleCombine, ByrdieThe evergirl, TeenPresent BridesPresent Edit SundayAnd today.